Playboy clubs history

In an August Hollywood Reporter article about NBC's new show The Playboy Club, Gloria Steinem, who worked undercover at the club to report on working conditions, predicted the show would not "depict the scene realistically." And if last night's episode was an allusion to Steinem's Bunny stint, the show has indeed taken rewriting history to a new level.

The episode introduces us to Bunny Doris, who we first see auditioning for a job at the club. Even though Club Manager Billy thinks she's "full of herself," Bunny Mother Carol-Lynne sticks her neck out and hires the enthusiastic applicant. Then we see Doris shakily begin her Bunny career, barely able to walk in her high heels. Despite the never-ending slew of annoying questions Doris fires at her new colleagues, her fellow Bunnies happily welcome her and give her the inside scoop.

Unfortunately, Doris turns out to be an undercover reporter for the Daily News. The friendly little Bunnies have been duped. But instead of reporting on sexual harassment, low wages and mandatory STD testing, like Steinem did (guess the rule against "dating" keyholders doesn't prohibit other activities...), Doris writes a sensationalized story, entitled "Bloody Bunny," about a Bunny who killed a man. In the one twist I actually didn't expect, that Bunny ends up being Janie (not Maureen, who we saw kill a man in the pilot), but of course Don Draper wannabe Nick Dalton saves the day, somewhat inexplicably.

Part two of the "Bloody Bunny" story is buried, and Doris is shamed by Carol-Lynne after she tries to explain herself:

Mother Bunny Carol-Lynne: These girls come from all walks of life, and they're just trying to go somewhere better ... we give these girls a chance. I don't understand why you would want to destroy that.

Bad Bunny Doris: I came here to find a big story, and I thought this was the kind of place where terrible, illicit things happened.

MBC: And instead you found a group of hard-working girls just trying to make a life for themselves. Why don't you write about that?

BBD: Because that kind of story doesn't sell papers.

MBC: Maybe not, but at least it's the truth.

So ... is that what Steinem should have written about? How Playboy empowered hard-working girls? Sadly, as much as the male producers of The Playboy Club are trying to convince viewers that Bunnies were the only women who could be anything they wanted, that they were changing the world, it's simply not the truth. I'm not even sure it's a television show ... seems more like a PR campaign.

Photo credit: www.nbc.com

Always a bridesmaid model...

I'm starting to wonder if bridesmaid models have the same cliched complex bridesmaids supposedly have ... "always a bridesmaid [model], never a bride [model]." (I for one have always enjoyed being a bridesmaid.)

Obsessively scouring the Internet for the perfect bridesmaid dresses for my beach wedding, I think I've come across every characterization of the bitter bridesmaid:

The scornful bridesmaid


The exhausted bridesmaid

The bridesmaids who hate each other


The bridesmaid who hates you

Sadly the pictures I took on a shopping excursion with two of my bridesmaids looked a lot like the above ... but I expect them to look more like this on MY SPECIAL DAY:

All smiles and swallowed resentment - even though I'm making them travel to Mexico...


Photo credits:
http://www.lizfields.com/Product/Bridesmaid-Dresses/Short-Empire-Style-230/
http://www.billlevkoff.com/style/bridesmaid-dress/569
http://www.landadesigns.com/index.php?main_page=index&cPath=4&sort=20a&page=7
http://www.billlevkoff.com/style/bridesmaid-dress/572 http://www.lizfields.com/Product/Bridesmaid-Dresses/Short-Sweetheart-Style-223/

Scary Face strikes spin class again

There is a woman who goes to my gym that makes this face while she's working out:It frightens me. Sometimes she sticks out her tongue and wiggles it. And she goes to about half the classes I go to...

I complained about her to a friend, and she informed me that Scary Face has lost over 100 pounds! Apparently she was the winner of some contest at our gym ... and apparently I am an insensitive jerk.

I am very impressed, but when Scary Face happens to be on the bike across from me at spin class, I tend to forget about how hard she must be working and instead become distracted by the facial calamity I can't help staring at.

Is it too much to ask that facial control be part of gym etiquette? I often make scary faces during spin class sprints and dancer's body squats (minus the wiggling tongue), but I courteously lower my head so no one has to witness the hideousness. I feel the same way about grunting. My high school gymnastics coach once told me not to be afraid to make noise while lifting weights because I'm a girl. I responded, "Ew! Neither gender should grunt like that in public!" (in my head). Let's save the strained noises and expressions for our home gyms and bathrooms, please.

Photo credit: http://www.costumecraze.com/BTMN70.html?c=cj,BTMN70?c=cj (In case you want to be my workout buddy for Halloween!)

A facial for your vulva!

A promotion I received today from a hair removal salon entertained and disturbed me so much that I've mustered the energy to end a rather long blogging dry spell.

Tucked away about halfway down an email titled "What's New in August," I found this:

Where to begin!? First of all, WHY would they use "What's New in August" as the email title (and subject line)? I would imagine something like "Does your vulva need a facial?" would have improved the open rate. Second, I'd just like to draw attention to what they've named the service: "Jewel Box" - as if "vagifacial" isn't descriptive and creepy enough.

But they are doing something right ... in terms of marketing (very wrong, of course, in terms of helping women, as those objectives are almost always at odds). Per Advertising 101, the text informs the consumer of a problem she probably didn't even know she had, and offers up a solution. And in doing so it taps into tried and true insecurities, but also creates new and innovative reasons for women to hate their bodies - and spend their money.

Perhaps Sketchers should shape up

Companies marketing "adult" products to young girls is nothing new (Abercrombie Kids' thongs, "sexy" Halloween costumes for tots, etc.), but something especially irks me about the new Sketchers Shape-ups for girls commercial. It's the sloppy and misguided use of "girl power."



What exactly is going on in the scene where the trim and happy girl is being chased by slovenly boys dressed in ice cream cone, cupcake and hot dog outfits? Girls rule and boys drool? Or skinny girls rule and fat girls drool over junk food? All of the above?

Girl power used to mean hairy armpits, burning bras and the rejection of oppressive norms. Then marketers got a hold of it and are trying to convince a younger generation that it means attaining the very same unattainable beauty standards the feminist movement tore down.

I think it's messed up that Sketchers is marketing Shape-ups to girls (and if you agree I encourage you to sign this petition). But I'm not going to deny there's a market for them (that's unfortunately probably a lot more profitable than Shape-ups for boys). What pisses me off more is that the campaign mixes the girl power message with another that tells girls as young as seven that they need to shape up.

I buy beauty products and am probably a little too obsessed with going to the gym... I also consider myself a feminist. I'm pretty sure the latter is in spite of, not because of, the former.

No boys allowed

I've been going to yet another new gym for a few months now, and I'm in like with it. What has kept my love from blossoming is one thing. Or person, rather. One rather smelly boy.

The reason I really like the gym is that it has an amazing variety of classes. I never get bored, even though I've been working out five days a week. What I do get at least once a week though is extremely irritated -- by the smelly boy, who consistently crashes the cardio dance class.

I like the class because it's supposed to be fun, but my dancing career ended with junior high school poms, and I'm not so comfortable shaking my booty in the presence of random men (at least when I'm sober and wearing a lot of spandex). I much prefer the aerobic atmosphere of women, united by shamelessness and gender.

The smelly boy waltzes into class halfway through, so he never learns the routine with us. He just watches us for a while and then "picks it up." Last week he sat on a bench that happened to be about a foot away from my face when we turned to the back of the room and did a move called "cleavage shot." My enthusiasm for the routine -- and my workout -- suffered as I tried to avoid eye contact. I thought I would get some relief when smelly boy finally joined the group, but he proceeded to pick a spot about two feet TOO CLOSE to me. Not only did his unbearable stench waft toward me every time we turned and dropped to the floor for push-ups (Ms. Fitness USA-style), but he ALMOST KICKED ME more than once. Sidenote: It was not a full class. There was PLENTY OF ROOM.

Then toward the end of the class, smelly boy waved in one of his friends who was lurking outside the door. At first I thought he was going to join us too -- which would have been annoying enough -- but no, he just STOOD THERE AND WATCHED for five or 10 minutes. All the booty-shaking, the cleavage-showing, the body-rolling. Just. Watched. I'm now getting the sceevies all over again just thinking about it.

What most perplexes me is that everyone else in the class seems to enjoy the male presence. Last week the instructor even named a dance move after the smelly boy. He doesn't even come to the whole class! And have I mentioned that he REEKS? I know people sweat at the gym, and I don't expect it to smell like roses, but this guy either doesn't wear deodorant or doesn't wash his shirt -- or more likely -- both. Crusty sweat stains speak for themselves.

I hate to be (reverse) sexist, but I'd think the smell -- and the awkwardness -- would be alleviated if the class were reserved for women. Not officially, of course; that would probably be illegal (or Curves). But it should just be understood. And if you are a boy who just loves to dance, at least show some respect -- for the schedule and our bodies, especially our delicate noses.

Laptops in the "ladies" room

I've noticed yet another disturbing trend lately -- laptops in the ladies' room. Twice now I've seen women coming out of my office bathroom with their laptops in tow. And a friend of mine confirmed she's witnessed it too. Apparently their work and/or bowels just cannot wait.

The second woman I saw actually smiled and said hello as I passed by her in shock and awe. Personally, I'm mortified by most bathroom activities and avoid eye contact whenever I go near it. So I'm thoroughly confused by this brazen bathroom behavior.

Should I be impressed by their work ethic -- or horrified by their uncleanliness?


Photo source: http://thenextweb.com/